Yes, it's been a while since I last posted but there's been lots going on....also I've just been darn too tired.

I think January was the last time I remeber feeling comfortable in my own skin. Starting in February, my body started breaking down on me. I guess with 2nd pregnancies, the body starts creaking and expanding much earlier. I feel like I'm carrying three bowling balls! But my doctor assures me there is only one baby inside and he is as happy as could be.

Still, I wish I were able to physically do more and feel better than I am feeling now. Jack is at such a wonderful age right now where he's picking up so much and wants to interact and play with mommy and daddy so much I feel bad when I can't pick him up when he asks to be picked up.

Here's a list of my complaints at the moment (6/17 cannot come soon enough!):

Very full belly - poeple at work keep asking when I'm due expecting an answer to be sometime in the next 3-4 weeks - they are shocked when I tell them I have another 8 weeks to go.

Sciatica - my butt radiates with pain, then down the back of my leg

General soreness and stiffness - getting up from my office chair, getting out of bed to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, or simply getting in and out of the car has been a test of will and endurance.

Fatigue and forgetfullness - the fatigue set back in as soon as I started the 3rd trimester. The forgetfullness has been every lasting this time around. I use strange phrasing, mix words or forget them altogether.

Clothes - items I wore during month 9 with Jack I can't even fit into as I head into month 8 with Ben.

Sickness - I have had 5 colds, one right after the other in some cases since being preggers with Ben. I have also acquired a lovely dry cough during the process. It's been 5 weeks since our family caught the nasty strain of flu and I'm the only one still coughing.

Swelling - the temperature reached 65 today. My fingers, calves, and feet swelled up.

It's HOT! I do not sleep with covers over me. I sleep in a tank top and shorts. This is quite strange as I'm usually over dressed for sleep as I tend to be cold. The temperature seems to bother me more this time than last.

At least there is one constant - Alex has been as helpful as ever doing what he can from house work to looking after Jack. I'm very appreciative and hope I can begin pitching in again after Ben is born. I hope for a speedy recovery so I can start helping out around the house again, as well as do some fun things with Jack this Summer.

2008

The first day in the first month of the year 2008 arrived and is almost about to end.

I cannot wait to see what will unfold in 2008 - what kind of adventures, pleasant surprises, opportunity and joy will come our way? It is exciting to think about the next 12 months to come.
One thing I know for sure is that we will be welcoming a new Maidy into our lives in early June. Jack will become an older sibling. It's strange to think of Jack in that capacity - he's our little man, our baby, our Fudge.

The Maidys and the Lims spent the first day of 2008 at my mom's house. We had traditional dumpling and rice cake soup along with other delicious Korean dishes (Kalbi, beef patty, seasoned veggies, tofu, Kalbi-Jeem, and Jap-Chae). As always, my mother made too much food and I enjoyed taking down every bite.

Afterwards, we all dressed up in our traditional Korean clothes (Hanbok) and performed Se Bea to my mother. It's traditional to bow to your elders and wish them a blessed new year. It was a real production to get everyone - especially the little ones - into their Hanboks and then get them to take pictures and perform Se Bea. Lots of cohersion and coaxing was required to get them to stay in their clothes. Of course, my mother's big concern was whether or not the little ones were wearing the traditional socks that go with the Hanboks. We got some great photos of everyone though. I think my mother really enjoyed having us over and taking pictures. There's nothing she loves more than having a lap full of grand children.

New Year resolutions? I hate to even make any as I know I will break them. So this year I think I will make a 'strive for' list - here it goes:

1) Wear make-up (at the very least, lipstick/gloss)
2) Start paying attention to what I wear again
3) Drink more water
4) Wear my wedding rings - after all, Alex went through a lot of trouble to provide it.
5) Read at least one fiction book

On purpose, I decided to make the 'strive for' list me centered. In 2007 I found myself asking quite a few times 'what the heck happened to me?' and I didn't like that feeling. If I lose myself, I cannot BE myself to my family and friends.

Infirm

I hate being sick.

I've been sick since Kate's birthday back in mid November and it's been non-stop fun from there on.

The on set of a soar throat, the tiredness and fatigue, the dryness in your nose, then congestion, sinus pressure and pain, the coughing for no good reason, the sleepless nights tossing and turning to get one good breath in through your one open nostril....ah, the head cold.

Eventually my chest hurts from coughing so much - no one gets much sleep as they are forced to lay awake listening to me cough, than gag, then lose my breath, then do it all over again all night long.

In the past two days I've gone through 2 boxes of tissue - and that's just at work. Alex bought me another vaporizer so that I can give myself a steam treatment. It does wonders to loosen up congestion in your head and chest. I also plan to gargle with salt water tonight so that my throat doesn't get any worse. Right now it feels raw - I am eating ice cream as anything cool seems to help.

The worst thing about being sick is that I cannot play with Jack the way I'd like. I'm hoping to feel at least 70% better by Saturday for some gingerbread house making at Wany's. I do not want to feel miserable for that.

The 2007 List

Well, it was really tough putting 10 things for the list this year as the things I really want are not at all practical to put on a holiday wish list (e.g. a new house, car paid off, Jack to never catch another cold again, no day care cost, to see the Florida Maidys...etc). So below are the 10 items I came up with.....

This year's top ten things I'd like to receive for Christmas:

1. Pajama pants & long sleeve pajama shirts (lots and lots of X-LARGE pajama pants/shirts to get me through winter pregnancy) flannel or cotton only please.
2. Coach purse
3. Cash (what can I say, I'm Korean)
4. Pedicure
5. Digital photo frame
6. Box of chocolates (but these have to be really really good chocolate - no Hershey's kind of stuff, please)
7. Martha Stewart's Complete Guide/Book to Housekeeping
8. Cleaning service
9. Alex to get his nose fixed so he stops snoring
10. Jack to say 'Mommy' to me on Christmas morning

Update

We have a new car - a minivan. Oh Lord, help us. The purchase was made after Alex succeeded in ruining his Stratus beyond repair.

First of all, let me say that I am very very very thankful Alex was not hurt in the car accident that ruined his car and forced us to now be a household with two car payments. I am also thankful that he does not suffer any residual aches and pains from the accident (read his blog for complete detail of accident).

I am also very thankful that the accident taught him a good lesson - there is no reason why a happily married man with a beautiful son and sick wife (suffering from OCD and control issues) should be out driving at 3am for the sake of watching a dumb movie which he would have received through NetFlix ANYWAY.

Thanksgiving - we are gathering my my sister's house again this year. I hate living in a small house. Alex and I both enjoy entertaining when we can, but in a smaller home, entertaining tends to be difficult - especially with Jack's things all over the place and no play room like at the Lim's palace. Hopefully this will change next year.

Christmas decorations will be going up this weekend. We MAY even venture out for some shopping on Black Friday...shivers. I think if anything, we'll hit target. I'm hoping to purchase a new Christmas tree - one worth having around for the next 5 years or so. Our old tree broke due to Newt constantly sleeping on the branches. Sigh.

The colder weather creates many cravings....right now I am craving spicey seafood noodle soup (Jamp-pong). Mmmmmm. Pita Inn would be nice too. Mmmmmm.....drooling.

Deep Breath

I have to remember that I do not work for a company, division, business unit, department or even a manager.

I work because of Jack. He's my boss, my inspiration, my motivation, all my hopes and dreams all neatly and handsomely tied in one person.

I must remember....I work so that I can provide the best possible for Jack.

Some days I need to remember the above more than other days.....today was such day....a day I needed to remember it really hard. :-)

I must remember....to buy a lotto ticket, and win it!

Contact

I am hopeless!

After many years of debate and failing eye sight, I finally decided to take the plunge and get contact lenses.

I was very nervous about putting the contacts in my eye. I should have been more nervous about getting them out.

I've ripped a total of 3 lenses so far. I've had contacts less than a week. I ripped the right lense first - they were stepped on (I thought I'd put them in the case after removing them from my right eye, but I had not - I dropped them on the bathroom floor). Then I ripped the left lense (same thing - thought I put it in the case, didn't, fell to bathroom floor). The third incident was the new left lense. I took them out, put them in the case and leaned in close to make sure the lense was in the case and not stuck to my finger or hanging on the side of the case wall when I noticed something that I thought was white debris or air bubble. It wasn't either. It was a rip.

I'm upset. Ripping your contacts is a normal thing when you first try them but three in one week? That's just a sign from God that you shouldn't wear them, or in my case, handle them.

Alex told me these things happen when you first get contacts and that it took him a couple of weeks before he got the hang of it. But here's the thing....it took him a few weeks when he was a grade schooler, just a grammer school kid! So if we were to translate that time in 'working professional' world/age that would actually be about 2-3 days!

I think I will ask for a month's worth of contacts so that I can practice for the next two weeks.