My husband recently blogged about a last letter (related to wills).
I however, will not have a list for the boys. My only instruction for them will be this:
ALWAYS listen to your father with respect at all times....then think about what your mother would do, and act on THAT.
Monday, August 25, 2008
He Doesn't Believe Me
I am not a big fan of tolerance or suffering on behalf of anyone or any thing.
We've only had two kids in the house for three months and I am already dreaming about a vacation of our own - just me and Alex - no kids, no diapers, no potty training, no bottles, and certainly being able to eat a hot meal the minute it is served without having to wipe someone's hands or face every two minutes or picking up something from the floor.
I told Alex as much, but he seems to be under the impression I am dreaming of such a vacation from the kids because this is the 'hard' time (as he calls it) and because I am still relatively new to having two kids in the house.
What my dear husband doesn't realize is that I am totally and completely being serious about wanting a vacation. He said it would be five years from now before we could even think about taking a vacation alone.
Five years from now the boys will be old enough where I will WANT to take them on vacation with me so that they can share in the experience. But right now, when their world is still somewhat smaller and limited due to their age, I'd like to set my feet down in a different place just for a while - alone.
I'd just need 3-4 days. He said we'd be lucky to get 2 days. Maybe he's right. Maybe from this point on it is useless to dream of such luxuries. Maybe I'm stupid for even thinking it could be possible.
I feel an immense pressure to act and think what is expected of me as a 'mother'.
But who wrote THAT book? And must I follow that? Does motherhood mean not wanting a vacation from the kids - ever? And does that mean I am a bad mother or evil becuase I thought it? What's the ettiquette for that? What is the proper amount of time that is deemed proper for a mother to voice that she would like a vacation from the kids without fear of judgment?
We've only had two kids in the house for three months and I am already dreaming about a vacation of our own - just me and Alex - no kids, no diapers, no potty training, no bottles, and certainly being able to eat a hot meal the minute it is served without having to wipe someone's hands or face every two minutes or picking up something from the floor.
I told Alex as much, but he seems to be under the impression I am dreaming of such a vacation from the kids because this is the 'hard' time (as he calls it) and because I am still relatively new to having two kids in the house.
What my dear husband doesn't realize is that I am totally and completely being serious about wanting a vacation. He said it would be five years from now before we could even think about taking a vacation alone.
Five years from now the boys will be old enough where I will WANT to take them on vacation with me so that they can share in the experience. But right now, when their world is still somewhat smaller and limited due to their age, I'd like to set my feet down in a different place just for a while - alone.
I'd just need 3-4 days. He said we'd be lucky to get 2 days. Maybe he's right. Maybe from this point on it is useless to dream of such luxuries. Maybe I'm stupid for even thinking it could be possible.
I feel an immense pressure to act and think what is expected of me as a 'mother'.
But who wrote THAT book? And must I follow that? Does motherhood mean not wanting a vacation from the kids - ever? And does that mean I am a bad mother or evil becuase I thought it? What's the ettiquette for that? What is the proper amount of time that is deemed proper for a mother to voice that she would like a vacation from the kids without fear of judgment?
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Does anyone read anymore?
This is my attempt to see how many (if any) people actually visit my blog and identify who they are.
I have been suspecting all along that no one really reads/visits my blog anymore so I shall test this.
If you have visited and read my blogs, please leave comment.
...now to see how long it takes to get a response - if any.
If no one is reading/visiting my blog, I might as well write what I really think, right? :-)
I have been suspecting all along that no one really reads/visits my blog anymore so I shall test this.
If you have visited and read my blogs, please leave comment.
...now to see how long it takes to get a response - if any.
If no one is reading/visiting my blog, I might as well write what I really think, right? :-)
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
I love my boys....really, I do!
Sometimes I still can't believe it. I am a mother of two.
It seems like just yesterday when Alex and I moved into this house we're in now - just the two of us, trying out new recipes, kicking back and watching all our favorite shows, having time to blog, sleeping through the night...and weekends were just more hours to fill with movies, seeing our friends, running errands, and oh yeah...sleeping in!
I dream about those days now and wonder why we didn't get more done!
These days, I'm lucky if I get a shower in during the day and Alex is lucky if he gets to watch one of his favorite shows on TV. We both have talked about what it would be like if we could just have one weekend, one day without the boys, where we could just sleep in...then we asked ourselves, would we be able to sleep past 6 or 7am on a Saturday? Would we automatically wake up during those hours anyways just as Jack has trained us to do?
When it was just Jack, Alex and I would ask ourselves from time to time "what in the world did we ever do with our time before we had Jack? This is so much fun!"
Now that we have two, Alex and I have asked ourselves "what would we do if we had just one day to ourselves?"
Don't get me wrong - we love our boys and having two kids was definitely what we wanted all along. We just never realized how much harder managing two kids 21 months apart would be in a tiny two bedroom condo.
Initially I rejected the hardship and kept wondering why Ben wouldn't sleep well like Jack did eight weeks into life and why the house was a mess on a daily basis, and why we were spending so much on groceries every week.
But now I think I am a point where I have resigned to the fact that I will never get enough sleep, weekend shopping excursions will be limited to Jewel and Target, and the house will not be clean or contain unstained, neat, unbroken things for at least the next 18 years.
My OCD (my needs) will just have to wait the next two decades while we try to raise two beautiful boys.
It seems like just yesterday when Alex and I moved into this house we're in now - just the two of us, trying out new recipes, kicking back and watching all our favorite shows, having time to blog, sleeping through the night...and weekends were just more hours to fill with movies, seeing our friends, running errands, and oh yeah...sleeping in!
I dream about those days now and wonder why we didn't get more done!
These days, I'm lucky if I get a shower in during the day and Alex is lucky if he gets to watch one of his favorite shows on TV. We both have talked about what it would be like if we could just have one weekend, one day without the boys, where we could just sleep in...then we asked ourselves, would we be able to sleep past 6 or 7am on a Saturday? Would we automatically wake up during those hours anyways just as Jack has trained us to do?
When it was just Jack, Alex and I would ask ourselves from time to time "what in the world did we ever do with our time before we had Jack? This is so much fun!"
Now that we have two, Alex and I have asked ourselves "what would we do if we had just one day to ourselves?"
Don't get me wrong - we love our boys and having two kids was definitely what we wanted all along. We just never realized how much harder managing two kids 21 months apart would be in a tiny two bedroom condo.
Initially I rejected the hardship and kept wondering why Ben wouldn't sleep well like Jack did eight weeks into life and why the house was a mess on a daily basis, and why we were spending so much on groceries every week.
But now I think I am a point where I have resigned to the fact that I will never get enough sleep, weekend shopping excursions will be limited to Jewel and Target, and the house will not be clean or contain unstained, neat, unbroken things for at least the next 18 years.
My OCD (my needs) will just have to wait the next two decades while we try to raise two beautiful boys.
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